The time has come to share with you something that is so huge I don’t know how I have kept it from you guys for so long.  Let me set the scene for you:  Its late Tuesday night and the German and Eric are settling down to eat their dinner at the dining room table (coffee table in my room{livingroom}).  I’m laying on my bed (futon) watching old episodes of the Chapelle’s show.  Eric ascends down on my bed and the German childishly sits down on the couch.  Eric has a glass of wine and so does the German.  Eric’s commenting on how good of a selection the wine is (I wanted to call bullshit, but I minded my own business).  Eric repeats a great Chapelle phrase, and makes it sound so stupid while the German giggles (this girl will laugh at anything).  I’m tired, but feeling playful, so I ask the German if her and Eric are boyfriend and girlfriend (hold your breath for this next comment), Eric interrupts her and says “Of course”.  I didn’t believe my ears (I have known this guy for 6 years and have never heard him say such a thing, him admitting this is like Bonds admitting that he has done steroids {still on of the best hitters ever}, I thought it would never happen)  I again gasped for air as I reached slyly for my recording device.  I still was asking questions about how and when they started “dating”.  I turned on the recording device and let more questions roll. So I asked if the LA trip was a date.  The German said no and the German’s boyfriend (the name I call Eric now, and it really pisses him off) said yes at the same time.  I laughed and the German corrected herself and said yes it was a date. Then I asked G’s BF (Eric) to tell me what the German was (little did he know I was taping it and I wanted to hear it from the horse’s mouth), and he confirmed “She is my girlfriend”, then he went off on some lame bullshit speech about just because I can’t commit to someone.  (Again I have this on tape)

T “ You guys have only known each other for a little over two weeks and you are already boyfriend and girlfriend.”

E (Lamest shit I have ever heard the G’s BF say, well maybe not he lamest, but top 100) “Tyler just because we can commit ourselves to one and another; unlike you does not make you better that you are better then us.”

T “That’s beautiful Eric.” German gives a little ummm huhh (broken English) “ You guys do make a beautiful couple”

E “I know”

G “Thank you” (BE)

T “Do you guys love each other?  An awkward silence covers the room as G’s BF starts to awkwardly drink his wine.

Then the conversation got worst as G’s BF kept up with the respectable gentleman bullshit.  It was sickening to hear the shit he was saying.

E:  “Tyler I not afraid to share my feelings with a special girl.”  I wanted to puke. 

The German watched her boyfriend saying all this bullshit with a look in her eye that reminded me of a little girl looking up to her respectful politician father (like the way Tom Delay’s daughter looks up to him with, yeah totally oblivious of the truth).

Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that I’m the most respectful person in this world but there is no way I would ever say the stuff the Senator Eric said.  I know all you guys that have been to the bars with me and say I’m just as bad, I agree, but I say it to total strangers and never believe a word I’m saying, I actually think the G’s BF really believed what he was saying.  It was the most amazing circling I have ever seen a vulture do.  Its like a vulture painting itself white and trying to get away as a Swan it just doesn’t work, but the German ate it up just as quick as the vulture could regurgitate the shit out.

I could not believe my ears and after the “interview” (as the G’s BF called it, little did he know it actually was an interview) was over.  I went straight to Jeff’s room to share the new information.

So it’s official the G’s BF can be a one woman man.  I thought it would never come, but, like they say, all good things must come to an end.

Ericism :

E “I’m more logical then any logic that you or anyone else knows, therefore, I am logic (long pause, I wait in question) and therefore, logic is me.”

T “That makes no sense”

E “Exactly, you don’t understand logic.”

If anyone understands this please tell me in simple terms.  Einstein I’m sure would be stumped also.